Lesbian Jodie Foster Blasts Bush Administration

A lesbian actor from Hollywood doesn't like the President? It may sound shocking, but it's true! In what could be explained as the main reason for the President's ever sinking numbers, Hollywood lesbians are joining the long list of disgruntled interest groups that no longer support his policies.

Despite the chill wind a-blowing around Hollywood that keeps most stars silent in regard to politics these days, Jodie Foster decided to "come out" against the man she and other Hollywood lesbians once so fervently supported. In a graduation speech on May 15th at the University of Pennsylvania Ms. Foster stated that the US and the world are worse off than they were four years ago. The actress also criticized US officials for their "disastrous and shameful" handling of Hurricane Katrina. She then finished her speech quoting fellow Ivy Leaguer and rap artist Eminem, "You better lose yourself in the music, the moment You own it, you better never let it go You only get one shot, do not miss your chance to blow This opportunity comes once in a lifetime yo," and received a standing ovation from the crowd.

Comedian Yakov Smirnoff was among the approximately 6,000 graduates at the ceremony. When asked about Ms. Foster's speech, he simply said, "An actress can get a standing ovation at a graduation speech by quoting a white rapper? Vot a country!" and added, "I know vot I'm going to say if I get asked to come back to do speech, I'm going to say,'Take heed 'cause I'm a lyrical poet Miami's on the scene just in case you didn't know it My town that created all the bass sound Enough to shake and kick holes in the ground 'Cause my style's like a chemical spill Feasible rhymes that you can vision and feel'"

Some are baffled at why Foster would suddenly take a pot-shot at a once beloved political figure amongst Hollywood lesbians. Political analyst / Air America radio host Randi Rhodes sees it this way, "Well... Jodie probably wants to give John Hinkley incentive to try to kill this president since she doesn't like him. And she probably waited until now because now he has a good opportunity since he's out of Saint E's on the weekends. I'm hoping her plan works. Hey! If you can't beat 'em, kill 'em - that's what I always say!"